Hail and well met
Well here I sit in the Casa De Terri and I don't know what I am going to post about.
I love her.
She loves me.
We get eachother on so many levels.
I know that things are good and am not going to screw that up.......
But this being unemployeed situation is wearing on my nerves. I don't want to lose her because I in the end I don't live up to the things I know I can do. If that even makes any sense.
I am also just worried that I lack the real foundation to make a relationship work. I mean look at my paterning (My family life for those that don't know what I was saying). My parents barely tolerate each other. Fights over the most ignorant of things are a daily affair. Neither one of them really lives anymore, they just muddle through waiting on the end of their life. I don't want to be that...but I already am.
Yeah that is what I realized before I started posting. I am just like them. I don't do anything or involve myself with anything larger then myself. I keep everything at arms length and never commit myself to any goals. I have to change...and that is going to hurt.
Oh yes change is going to hurt, I don't fool myself on that fact. It is just a matter of choosing when I do it. Now or later. Sooner or farther away. Next week or next month, or next year.
There is no guide books on this subject. Not many have experiance to give advice. In the end all the advice and comments will come to naught cause it is my choice and I am the only one that can live it.
Jeez I hate it when it comes back to me.
Oh well all I have time to type right now.
I will be home tuesday durring the day depending on the arrival time for the train.
Later all.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Matt-Man on the sly
Hail and well met
Not going to post much...which means of course that this will be a 10 pager. No not really cause there is not much to post (or too much)
I am doing well and the house I am watching is also ok. We have had a few tantrums but I was able to get it in line.
I have been watching Smallville...actually a good show when you see it all in a row. Yet again another show that I will have to keep up with, will it never end.
Having the usual bouts of doubts and run ins with Mr. Depression but that is to be expected.
Terri is coming down on the 5th of august for the day. That is a Saturday and I am leaving things open as to what we are doing. I am hoping to finish up her introductions with everyone.
Oh yeah and still don't know what is up with my computer, but then again I haven't really asked about it. Kind of don't want to hear the news if it is as bad as I feel it could be. Not really in the mood to have yet one more avenue of my freedom stripped from me and another barrier between me and the world put up. Oh well such is the nature of life. If it doesn't kill you it gives you some real neat scars to talk about and twitches can be quite entertaining.
Hope all is going well...not that anyone would tell me if it wasn't...but I still hope it is.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Not going to post much...which means of course that this will be a 10 pager. No not really cause there is not much to post (or too much)
I am doing well and the house I am watching is also ok. We have had a few tantrums but I was able to get it in line.
I have been watching Smallville...actually a good show when you see it all in a row. Yet again another show that I will have to keep up with, will it never end.
Having the usual bouts of doubts and run ins with Mr. Depression but that is to be expected.
Terri is coming down on the 5th of august for the day. That is a Saturday and I am leaving things open as to what we are doing. I am hoping to finish up her introductions with everyone.
Oh yeah and still don't know what is up with my computer, but then again I haven't really asked about it. Kind of don't want to hear the news if it is as bad as I feel it could be. Not really in the mood to have yet one more avenue of my freedom stripped from me and another barrier between me and the world put up. Oh well such is the nature of life. If it doesn't kill you it gives you some real neat scars to talk about and twitches can be quite entertaining.
Hope all is going well...not that anyone would tell me if it wasn't...but I still hope it is.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
Matt-Man VS Technology
Hail and well met
Well it was bound to happen again. My computer is on the fritz and this time I have a real bad feeling that it is bad. I will have to get it verified by Ben, but that will have to wait for right now.
I am going to be up at Terri's for a few days keeping an eye on her dog Jackson. He is sick and she is worried that if something happens she won't be there to help him out. So I am stepping up to help relieve this stress. I will be able to get calls on my phone but not answer them as I only have like 3 minutes left before it shuts down. So feel free to call and if I can I will respond via other means.
Anyway I have to go and get ready and the like. Hope everyone is doing ok. I will see you all friday for star wars.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Well it was bound to happen again. My computer is on the fritz and this time I have a real bad feeling that it is bad. I will have to get it verified by Ben, but that will have to wait for right now.
I am going to be up at Terri's for a few days keeping an eye on her dog Jackson. He is sick and she is worried that if something happens she won't be there to help him out. So I am stepping up to help relieve this stress. I will be able to get calls on my phone but not answer them as I only have like 3 minutes left before it shuts down. So feel free to call and if I can I will respond via other means.
Anyway I have to go and get ready and the like. Hope everyone is doing ok. I will see you all friday for star wars.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Matt-Man did not order waffles, Matt-Man ordered STEAK!!!!
Hail and well met
Well let me just get this off the burner fast and quick. I am not working at the Post Office. I have declined the position that was given to me. Why? You ask.
Well first and foremost it was not the position that I applied for in the first place. Second it was a hell position in which I would have been working between 2 and 14 hours a night at the discretion of my supervisor and that could change on a daily basis. Thirdly it is completely a temp position and has not one single opportunity for career advancement. Lastly by declining the position I maintain my status in the Post Office and if something else comes up my action has no bearing on my getting that job.
All in all I would be gaining not one damn thing other then a WHOLE lot of stress and with the gas usage I would have to work at least 25 or so hours to keep the van running. Not worth the effort.
I have some other opportunities and some of them do involve the Post Office(just not the factory). I will be pursuing these over the next few days. Yes I am disappointed but I sure as hell am not giving up or getting depressed. I started to but then the thought of my Lady came to me and BAM! All that dark depression just went away.
Everything happens for a reason and this is no exception. I will find work and it will be gainful and not cause me the kind of stress that I was under at GO in the final days.
The only real bad thing is that this pretty much kills any chance of my going to GenCon. Oh well it was a good run of not missing one but it had to end some time. I will miss it though. tear falls from eye
But there is always next year!
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Well let me just get this off the burner fast and quick. I am not working at the Post Office. I have declined the position that was given to me. Why? You ask.
Well first and foremost it was not the position that I applied for in the first place. Second it was a hell position in which I would have been working between 2 and 14 hours a night at the discretion of my supervisor and that could change on a daily basis. Thirdly it is completely a temp position and has not one single opportunity for career advancement. Lastly by declining the position I maintain my status in the Post Office and if something else comes up my action has no bearing on my getting that job.
All in all I would be gaining not one damn thing other then a WHOLE lot of stress and with the gas usage I would have to work at least 25 or so hours to keep the van running. Not worth the effort.
I have some other opportunities and some of them do involve the Post Office(just not the factory). I will be pursuing these over the next few days. Yes I am disappointed but I sure as hell am not giving up or getting depressed. I started to but then the thought of my Lady came to me and BAM! All that dark depression just went away.
Everything happens for a reason and this is no exception. I will find work and it will be gainful and not cause me the kind of stress that I was under at GO in the final days.
The only real bad thing is that this pretty much kills any chance of my going to GenCon. Oh well it was a good run of not missing one but it had to end some time. I will miss it though. tear falls from eye
But there is always next year!
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Saturday, July 08, 2006
Matt-Man Gets the Post
Hail and well met
IT FINALLY CAME!!!! Friday at around 5 or 6 I get a call telling me that a priority letter had arrived. With my permission it was opened and a single sheet of paper came out telling me that I am employed with the USPS! Woooooot!
I am to show up at 8:00 sharp on Monday at the Bedford Park facility for my three day orientation. I should find out then what is up and where I am to be posted. I am really hoping for the Frankfort Post Office, cause first off I would be able to get there far quicker then Bedford Park, and I would be able to pick up some days at the Mattson Post Office which means more money!
Any way I am stoked about this and I cannot wait to get back in the swing of things. Just sitting around has been just a bit nerve racking.
Ok well not much else to say except that everyone should remember that next weekend is the Ren Fair! We need to be at Terri's house around 9 in the morning that Sunday so that means leaving from here around no later then 7 and more like 6:30 so we have plenty of time to get there. Also remember that there is a BBQ after. It should be a blast.
Ok well that is all the time I have for today, I will speak to everyone as I see them.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
IT FINALLY CAME!!!! Friday at around 5 or 6 I get a call telling me that a priority letter had arrived. With my permission it was opened and a single sheet of paper came out telling me that I am employed with the USPS! Woooooot!
I am to show up at 8:00 sharp on Monday at the Bedford Park facility for my three day orientation. I should find out then what is up and where I am to be posted. I am really hoping for the Frankfort Post Office, cause first off I would be able to get there far quicker then Bedford Park, and I would be able to pick up some days at the Mattson Post Office which means more money!
Any way I am stoked about this and I cannot wait to get back in the swing of things. Just sitting around has been just a bit nerve racking.
Ok well not much else to say except that everyone should remember that next weekend is the Ren Fair! We need to be at Terri's house around 9 in the morning that Sunday so that means leaving from here around no later then 7 and more like 6:30 so we have plenty of time to get there. Also remember that there is a BBQ after. It should be a blast.
Ok well that is all the time I have for today, I will speak to everyone as I see them.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Matt-Man Takes the Train
Hail and well met
Well it is time for a real quick update.
I still have not heard from the Post Office. Grrrrrrrrrrrr
I am getting ready to head out and take the train to meet Terri at the station near her work for a couple of days with my lady. I am going to be cleaning her house a little in preperation for next weekends festivities. Woot for the Ren fair and the BBQ after.
Other then that I am doing well and things are going ok. Hope to see everyone on Saturday while Terri and myself are in town.
Ok well that is it. Wow a quick one that is really quick.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Well it is time for a real quick update.
I still have not heard from the Post Office. Grrrrrrrrrrrr
I am getting ready to head out and take the train to meet Terri at the station near her work for a couple of days with my lady. I am going to be cleaning her house a little in preperation for next weekends festivities. Woot for the Ren fair and the BBQ after.
Other then that I am doing well and things are going ok. Hope to see everyone on Saturday while Terri and myself are in town.
Ok well that is it. Wow a quick one that is really quick.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
Meanwhile in the Matt-Cave
Hail and well met
I haven't posted lately simply due to not a lot going on...well except being drivin insane waiting for the damn letter from the Post Office telling me when to show up for orientation. Having to endure their beurocratic bullshit whilst I sit here desperatly in need of "PAYCHECK"! I am so glad that they have all the time in the world, just like God. But as my Lover would say "everything happens for a reason" and she is right. I will just endure this aggrivation and know that on the other side of the screen God has everything well in hand. Human nature is all about instant gratification so I just need to step out of my animal side and embrace the spiritual side again.
Ok well in other news I am still plugging away on my drawing, skills are still rusty but I am hammering them out. I do need to pick up some referance materials soon...back to needing that damn paycheck again...but intill then I am just covering the basics. I have been reading as well. I am just about done with "Beast" by the author of "Jaws". It is about a giant squid that attakcs Bermuda. Not an epic story but a good read. Picked up part of a series the other day I am missing the first two books and I think a book in the middle...but I am not sure and as I forgot to do the internet search before starting this post I don't have that information in front of me. Yes I know that I could pause and run the search in a new tab (I run firefox, AMAZING program, you all should use it) but I am not in the mood to run downstairs and find the book and then bring it back up here just to give you all the details on what I don't have. I do remember the title of the first book. "The Dragon and the George" a story about a contempory man transported into a midevil world where his only saving grace is the power to transform in to a dragon at will. There are either 5 or 6 books in the series as far as I know. I plan on tracking them down sooner or later.
OH yeah everyone remember that we are going to the Ren Fair on Sunday the 16th of July. We need to be up there at Terri's by 9:00 in the morning. The money is due on the day of the Fair and it is 15 dollars per person. Afterword we are heading back to her place for a BBQ and party. Sleeping space is available for those that need to "rest up after a LONG DAY"...yeah ok if you decide to drink then you won't be driving so there will be places to bunk. It should be an awesome time and I look forward to it.
I know that there was something else I wanted to post but right now my brain is feeling like that egg in those commercials, and I ain't on drugs. I hate hot weather, with a passion.
Oh well if it comes to me then I will just have to drop a new post.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
I haven't posted lately simply due to not a lot going on...well except being drivin insane waiting for the damn letter from the Post Office telling me when to show up for orientation. Having to endure their beurocratic bullshit whilst I sit here desperatly in need of "PAYCHECK"! I am so glad that they have all the time in the world, just like God. But as my Lover would say "everything happens for a reason" and she is right. I will just endure this aggrivation and know that on the other side of the screen God has everything well in hand. Human nature is all about instant gratification so I just need to step out of my animal side and embrace the spiritual side again.
Ok well in other news I am still plugging away on my drawing, skills are still rusty but I am hammering them out. I do need to pick up some referance materials soon...back to needing that damn paycheck again...but intill then I am just covering the basics. I have been reading as well. I am just about done with "Beast" by the author of "Jaws". It is about a giant squid that attakcs Bermuda. Not an epic story but a good read. Picked up part of a series the other day I am missing the first two books and I think a book in the middle...but I am not sure and as I forgot to do the internet search before starting this post I don't have that information in front of me. Yes I know that I could pause and run the search in a new tab (I run firefox, AMAZING program, you all should use it) but I am not in the mood to run downstairs and find the book and then bring it back up here just to give you all the details on what I don't have. I do remember the title of the first book. "The Dragon and the George" a story about a contempory man transported into a midevil world where his only saving grace is the power to transform in to a dragon at will. There are either 5 or 6 books in the series as far as I know. I plan on tracking them down sooner or later.
OH yeah everyone remember that we are going to the Ren Fair on Sunday the 16th of July. We need to be up there at Terri's by 9:00 in the morning. The money is due on the day of the Fair and it is 15 dollars per person. Afterword we are heading back to her place for a BBQ and party. Sleeping space is available for those that need to "rest up after a LONG DAY"...yeah ok if you decide to drink then you won't be driving so there will be places to bunk. It should be an awesome time and I look forward to it.
I know that there was something else I wanted to post but right now my brain is feeling like that egg in those commercials, and I ain't on drugs. I hate hot weather, with a passion.
Oh well if it comes to me then I will just have to drop a new post.
May the Force be with you
Excelsior!!!
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