Matt-man in the Dead of Night

Hail and well met

So a man bursts into his psychiatrist's office.
"Ya gotta help me doc. I cannot stop thinking I am a deck of cards!"
Angry at the interruption the doctor yells
"Wait outside. I will deal with you later."

I found this book of 1001 "great" jokes. Well the great part is questionable, but they are my kind of jokes. I intend on memorizing as many as I can and spewing them to any and all I see. A little stupid humor is a good thing.

Oh and the title is in deference to it being 3:15 in the morning, with me sitting here typing. In part I am trying to avoid certain themes in my dreams of late. I would normally go into detail but I think not this time. I mean if it was the normal zombies tearing me apart I would have no problem sharing, but this is just a little too far off the path. No I won't even hint at it so don't ask even in person. Just trust me that going there is not something I want to do, and for some reason it just keeps coming. I have tried so many tricks, reading a book before going to bed, watching a movie, playing a video game and nothing has the slightest affect on the nature or theme of my dreams. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr it is so annoying.

Ah well, such is life.

So anyway I am working on my Iron Kingdoms campaign, Chris is joining this Friday and I have to come up with a good hook to bring him in. It should be easier with the bar and all, but finding a way to tie a new player to the rest of the group is never easy.

Then of course there is this crazy idea that I had for a World of Darkness campaign. I mean there I was just watching Van Helsing and it struck me like a bolt of lightning. I saw the entire plot unfold and I had to get it down. Now I have always been thorough with my games (well in my head at least) but this is the first one that I have actually sat down and researched stuff on the internet for. The crazy thing is that so much of it is actually historically in line. People lived at the same time and even had connections that fit with the story. I have to say that in some ways it is almost creepy, kind of like the All Flesh Must Be Eaten game I ran with Shep showing up at the back door at the same time he did in the story. So that is progressing far beyond anything I would have thought of and if I can keep my brain focused it should turn out to be a grand adventure.

The pisser in all of this is Beyond Mere Mortals/Champions. I have been totally unable to get a story to even entertain the idea of forming. I know that I had concepts from last year, I have my notes but nothing is coming. I don't want to force it, that is how I fucked (yes I am using a curse word, nothing else really captures the severity of the situation) up Star Wars last year.

I know that everyone was running off in their own directions, I know that they were all ignoring the blatant plot hooks that I was throwing at them. I know all that, but in the end I was the GM and I should have been able to pull you all together with the story and I did not. So it died a terrible slow death that ended when I pulled out the tried and true story killer. It was all a dream/simulation. Yup that has killed so many plotlines and stories I cannot count, of course they deserved to die and as such I don't remember them. Since then I have been just a little gun shy of doing a really long and self made campaign. Chirs helped out when his Saturday D&D game took off and he needed to split his group of 18 players. I mean I did not lose the ability to GM, just the confidence to make my own story and have it proceed and develop with the players. Yes, yes I know that I have said all this before and yes I know what you all say, but it was just a fact that I had never failed at Gm'ing before that, never. I mean if you have always been able to do math and suddenly you go 2+2=9 and blow a test, it will mess with your head.

So anyway I am feeling better, to use a colloquialism "I am back in the saddle again". That is why the whole BMM/Champions thing is so agonizing. I have it back but it won't go there. Oh well I just have to be patient and see if it sneaks up on me.

Well I am having trouble typing so I will bid all a goodnight.

May the Force be with you

Excelsior!!!